"If you understood everything I said, you'd be me" - Miles Davis
"There is much pleasure to be gained from useless knowledge." - Bertrand Russell
"Take away the right to say fuck and you take away the right to say fuck the government." - Lenny Bruce
"Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true!" - Homer Simpson

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Overheard parking lot cell phone call: "so, you got candy in your laptop"
Overheard parking lot cell phone call: "so, you got candy in your laptop"

Twitter Sun, 29 Jan 2012 03:04:46
Tweet 163578325426651136

Damn, I was so looking forward to a year without the bombastic inanity of pro football
Damn, I was so looking forward to a year without the bombastic inanity of pro football

Twitter Mon, 25 Jul 2011 21:50:30
Tweet 95732707434299393

Twitter is suggesting that I follow John McCain. My anti-profiling-software kung-fu is strong
Twitter is suggesting that I follow John McCain. My anti-profiling-software kung-fu is strong

Twitter Tue, 21 Jun 2011 05:36:34
Tweet 83166421491789824

RT @pattonoswalt: I hope my obituary headline includes the words "runs amok".
RT @pattonoswalt I hope my obituary headline includes the words "runs amok".

Twitter Tue, 21 Jun 2011 05:39:31
Tweet 83167163174760448

Impatient for caffeine hallucinations #easilyentertained
Impatient for caffeine hallucinations #easilyentertained

Twitter Fri, 10 Jun 2011 05:31:38
Tweet 79178914299248640

Who's got 2 thumbs and can recover mailboxes from an Exchange server backup? This guy! #ITnerdstreetcred
Who's got 2 thumbs and can recover mailboxes from an Exchange server backup? This guy! #ITnerdstreetcred

Twitter Tue, 31 May 2011 23:58:46
Tweet 75833652528955393

RT @thebenbrooks: I don't want to play nice. I'd rather pull out my flame thrower and channel Bill Hicks.
RT @thebenbrooks I don't want to play nice. I'd rather pull out my flame thrower and channel Bill Hicks.

Twitter Sat, 07 May 2011 04:29:00
Tweet 66784875239313408

My new glasses makes everything so sharp my brain thinks stuff must be really close, and therefore REALLY small #gulliversyndrome
My new glasses makes everything so sharp my brain thinks stuff must be really close, and therefore REALLY small #gulliversyndrome

Twitter Tue, 03 May 2011 17:12:39
Tweet 65584591037153280

Have they shut down the federal government yet? Because I want to go hunt bigfoots with dynamite.
Have they shut down the federal government yet? Because I want to go hunt bigfoots with dynamite.

Twitter Sat, 02 Apr 2011 19:35:56
Tweet 54386624573878272

I want some of those Libyan drugs that makes you revolt against heavily armed dictators. Could come in handy
I want some of those Libyan drugs that makes you revolt against heavily armed dictators. Could come in handy

Twitter Sun, 27 Feb 2011 00:04:22
Tweet 41770602792624128

It's 9:30pm and "Seattle Snowpocalypse III - The Revenge of the Snith" is STILL a no-show. #allexcitedovernothing
It's 9:30pm and "Seattle Snowpocalypse III - The Revenge of the Snith" is STILL a no-show. #allexcitedovernothing

Twitter Wed, 23 Feb 2011 02:14:14
Tweet 40647375185915904

Two doors down, the neighbors are fire-twirling.
Two doors down, the neighbors are fire-twirling.

Twitter Tue, 21 Dec 2010 21:26:14
Tweet 17450822300340224

Ah, another holiday season wishing that there was a real "War On Xmas", the kind with guns and flamethrowers
Ah, another holiday season wishing that there was a real "War On Xmas", the kind with guns and flamethrowers

Twitter Sat, 04 Dec 2010 06:14:38
Tweet 11060813662003200

"The owner has disabled downloading of their photos" - sweet naive Flickr - you make me laugh.
"The owner has disabled downloading of their photos" - sweet naive Flickr - you make me laugh.

Twitter Tue, 31 Aug 2010 00:16:24
Tweet 22598473123

I think I successfully installed a new SSL certificate on the Exchange server-ask me next week when the old one expires.Ooh, the suspense...
I think I successfully installed a new SSL certificate on the Exchange server-ask me next week when the old one expires.Ooh, the suspense...

Twitter Fri, 30 Jul 2010 22:34:51
Tweet 19973527677

Successfully reinstalled drawstring in favorite shorts - bailing wire fixes what duct tape can't.
Successfully reinstalled drawstring in favorite shorts - bailing wire fixes what duct tape can't.

Twitter Fri, 23 Jul 2010 15:49:17
Tweet 19349270533

2 hours online and Flash hasn't broken on Firefox - I think one of the recent Ubuntu updates might actually have fixed it - weee
2 hours online and Flash hasn't broken on Firefox - I think one of the recent Ubuntu updates might actually have fixed it - weee

Twitter Fri, 23 Jul 2010 07:16:42
Tweet 19346908554

Hate Hate Hate Network Storage Boxen - When they lose network access they turn into data-trapping cinder blocks.
Hate Hate Hate Network Storage Boxen - When they lose network access they turn into data-trapping cinder blocks.

Twitter Fri, 16 Jul 2010 19:30:36
Tweet 18738121818

Added a Mail Client and a Transport Rule to the Exchange Server, now my phone will get a message if the Novell Server crashes #geek
Added a Mail Client and a Transport Rule to the Exchange Server, now my phone will get a message if the Novell Server crashes #geek

Twitter Fri, 09 Jul 2010 05:59:17
Tweet 18119903691

Deep in the Geek: I successfully diagnosed and fixed a Novell server misconfiguration.
Deep in the Geek: I successfully diagnosed and fixed a Novell server misconfiguration.

Twitter Tue, 29 Jun 2010 05:59:34
Tweet 17334321737

The weekend is coming - somebody kidnap me and make me do drugs and booze - ROADTRIP....shotgun
The weekend is coming - somebody kidnap me and make me do drugs and booze - ROADTRIP....shotgun

Twitter Fri, 18 Jun 2010 08:05:36
Tweet 16480664687

Too much working with computers: Looked at a stand of blackberry bushes and wondered how to change the settings for flower color.
Too much working with computers: Looked at a stand of blackberry bushes and wondered how to change the settings for flower color.

Twitter Fri, 18 Jun 2010 07:18:18
Tweet 16477463580

Today we're going to transplant/migrate the Novell server hard-drives. This could get nasty.
Today we're going to transplant/migrate the Novell server hard-drives. This could get nasty.

Twitter Wed, 16 Jun 2010 06:35:15
Tweet 16310567874

Learned that work has a satellite dish on the roof. For a second there I felt like a Bond villain
Learned that work has a satellite dish on the roof. For a second there I felt like a Bond villain

Twitter Sat, 12 Jun 2010 13:24:21
Tweet 16030503983

More successful at new "computer guy" duties > Cracked Debian and Vista passwords of the last "computer guy". No pr0n, just "Akira"
More successful at new "computer guy" duties > Cracked Debian and Vista passwords of the last "computer guy". No pr0n, just "Akira"

Twitter Fri, 21 May 2010 15:30:54
Tweet 14435033595

It seems so obvious now, but I had to learn the hard way that million-file directories
makes Windows cry It seems so obvious now, but I had to learn the hard way that million-file directories makes Windows cry

Twitter Wed, 19 May 2010 18:33:17
Tweet 14333822758

First day of new "computer guy" duties did not go well - 2 weeks work is now sitting on
an unreadable hard drive. First day of new "computer guy" duties did not go well - 2 weeks work is now sitting on an unreadable hard drive.

Twitter Wed, 19 May 2010 08:04:04
Tweet 14265910014

Upgraded Kubuntu Karmic to Lucid. Houston, we have bugs.
Upgraded Kubuntu Karmic to Lucid. Houston, we have bugs.

Twitter Sun, 09 May 2010 01:13:22
Tweet 13683968562

Bookstore receiving clerks are my secret super heroes
Bookstore receiving clerks are my secret super heroes - Adventures in Receiving -

Twitter Tue, 04 May 2010 08:40:15
Tweet 13373032749

Oh, NOW you can get a video game merit badge. Pong didn't even exist when I had to wear that g$#!&m itchy uniform. 1 word: RETROACTIVE
Oh, NOW you can get a video game merit badge. Pong didn't even exist when I had to wear that g$#!&m itchy uniform. 1 word: RETROACTIVE

Twitter Thu, 29 Apr 2010 23:50:23
Tweet 13117164529