"If you understood everything I said, you'd be me" - Miles Davis
"There is much pleasure to be gained from useless knowledge." - Bertrand Russell
"Take away the right to say fuck and you take away the right to say fuck the government." - Lenny Bruce
"Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true!" - Homer Simpson

Utility Fog Banner

Scarier Than Zombies

Youth beauty pageant photography:

child beauty pageant glamour photo

High Glitz
Via John Moe (Twitter)

I had to create a new directory/catagory, because this is neither funny or cool.

Middleman Finale

"The Middleman, one of the greatest and craziest shows ever to bludgeon television with awesomeness, finally got the finale it deserves. The cast read the unaired finale script, and it was like the greatest rock concert ever.

Oh man, it is so great to see the Middleman cast all together talking glibly and to hear Matt Keeslar spouting incomprehensible dialogue and crazy plot stuff like:

"Prophecies of Orac! A Polyditetrahexamono-Trioctalon?"

Or Wendy's line: "Look at all those pineal glands. It's like a gland-nado." To which Tyler says: "A tornado made of glands?" And then Manservant Neville says "You must admit, my plan is sheer elegance in its draconian complexity.""

The Middleman Returned, And Our Heads Exploded!

I found 5 sequential clips on YouTube:

SDCC 09 Middleman Panel Clip #1

Emperor Norton for President
emperor norton
fake currency
Norton Imperial Note
Via Richard Kadrey (Twitter)

Only 6 months to Season 6 (Sob)
Mysteries Of The Universe - Dharma Initative
Via Lostpedia

Appearing in Secret

"...a French cinema historian and two US crime-writers almost simultaneously happened on the same bizarre discovery - that Raymond Chandler, uncredited and previously unnoticed, has a tiny cameo in Double Indemnity. On 14 January, the American mystery writer Mark Coggins, tipped off by another writer, John Billheimer, posted the news on his website, Riordan's desk (tinyurl.com/raymondchandler), while the French journalist Olivier Eyquem, wrote about on his blog (tinyurl.com/chandlerfrench) on March 30."

Chandler's double identity
Via baileycoybooks

Lethal Pleasure

"Is this the worst drink on the planet? All signs point to yes. First off, it has an ingredient list that reads like an organic chemistry final. Those 70-plus ingredients conspire to pack this shake with more sugar than 29 Fudgsicles, as much fat as a stick and a half of butter, and more calories than 48 actual Oreos. Oh, it also has 3 days' worth of saturated fat and, most bizarre of all, as much salt as you?ll find in 9 bags of Lay's Classic potato chips. Need more proof? Let?s hope not."

The Unhealthiest Drinks in America 2009
Via The Slog

Not What I Was Expecting

"Despeckle" filter gave unexpected results:

Train Go Boom

Wait for it...

Train vs. Tornado - Spectacular! - YouTube
Via MetaFilter

Reality Challenged
The Odd Lies Of Sarah Palin: A Round-Up - It's a long list.
Via Boing Boing

High Weirdness

"According to a police report, a "nicely dressed" middle-aged man entered the hospital around 10:00 AM and approached a receptionist, and dropped a note on her desk.

About an hour later, the receptionist looked at the note, which was written in code, and immediately contacted hospital security. Harborview security officers were able to decipher the note and turned it over to police, who forwarded it to the bomb squad and intelligence unit for investigation."

Police Investigate Mysterious Coded Message Left At Hospital

Koino American Football / Finger5
Via MetaFilter

"Skronk" ?
 grafitti newtown enmore sydney australia 2009

GRAFFITI_NEWTOWN_0709_204 (Flickr)

If I'm Having Nightmares, Everybody's Having Nightmares
ronald mcdonald halloween scary
Via riotclitshave

Small Pleasures

I like to turn the sound off on the TV and just watch the actors in the background. Not the extras, but the ones not taking part in the main conversation. Ted Levine in "Monk" is good for this. Even if he's just listening to another character talk on the phone he's doing something, but not enough to be distracting. ACTING!

Love is the Drug
Midget Wreslers Killed By Female Gang
Via Digg